Magnetic Sales Appeal

Maybe you know someone who exudes charm – who attracts people like a magnet and effortlessly wins them over. That kind of appeal could make you a mint in sales, and now performance expert and author Tony Alessandra tells you how to get it. In his new book, Charisma: Seven Keys to Developing the Magnetism that Leads to Success, Alessandra dispels the myth that you’re either born with charisma or not, and shows you how to develop yours to attract more prospects, sell them and keep them. With his help, you could be maximizing your personality potential and fighting off prospects in no time.

1. Send the right silent messages. Part of having charisma is having presence. Alessandra explains, “The physical aspects – the way we dress, our handshake, our eye contact, our posture, our smile and how we look in terms of health and energy – make the first impression.” Charismatic people are winners and want to look their best.

Of course, looks aren’t everything. “The intellectual side deals with your mental fitness, your depth and breadth of knowledge,” Alessandra says. He advises “strengthening and stretching your mind by reading, doing, watching and listening.”

The psychological and emotional aspects of silent messages go hand-in-hand. Whereas the former refers to thoughts – about yourself, your goals and what you are doing to reach them – the latter deals with your feelings about those issues. The final aspect of silent messages, the spiritual, shows “your level of caring, your attitude toward service, the sense of higher purpose or greater good that you communicate and your willingness to help others,” Alessandra explains. To send a silent message your buyers can’t ignore, make sure your messages measure up in all five areas.

2. Listen with care. Making others feel attractive tends to make you more attractive to them, and careful listening is persuasive flattery. Just remember, says Alessandra, listening and hearing are not the same. “Listening is more than the physical process of hearing, it’s intellectual and emotional effort. You have to ask questions, give feedback, remain objective, figure out what is really being said and what is not being said. You need to observe and interpret body language. Good listening draws people to you. Poor listening causes them to drift away.”

3. Persuade and prosper. For many people, power has an undeniable appeal, and persuading others to your way of thinking requires at least a small degree of power over them. What’s more, persuasion skill helps enhance your sales as well as your charisma. “Many people just aren’t skilled at the art of persuading,” Alessandra says, “and no matter how brilliant your idea, no matter how technically advanced or economically sound, it goes nowhere unless you can sell others on it, which is crucial in sales. The only way to get people to go along with you is to persuade them. Communicate clearly why they should do what you need done or what you would like them to do.” Also, put yourself in your buyers’ place to gauge the impact of your arguments on them.

4. If you can’t say something well… People who speak well have a way of sounding competent and authoritative even when they aren’t. “You can have a terrific idea, but who’s going to know about it if you don’t articulate it?” Alessandra asks. He says speaking with authority; overcoming stage fright; preparing for a talk; knowing your audience and how to get and keep their attention; knowing your material; and knowing how to deliver the knockout punch help you give a speech that leaves your listeners speechless, which boosts your charisma quotient. Better speaking skills aren’t incidental to your success, they are the key to it. Keep yours polished to keep prospects and buyers interested.

5. Respect others’ space and time. Sometimes you can bring buyers closer by giving them more space. Charismatic people put everyone at ease by knowing when to get close and when to back off.

“It affects the level of tension or trust between you and another person,” Alessandra says of your ability to respect others’ space. “Contact-oriented people communicate closer physically, mentally and emotionally. Noncontact people keep others at arm’s length and share information on a need-to-know basis.” When you can’t tell one type from another, Alessandra says, “take in the initial feelings you get from people. I deal with others at arm’s length unless I know them and what they’re like.”

Just as they respect others’ space, charismatic people also respect others’ time, so they won’t waste yours. “How you use your time with others can also create tension or trust,” Alessandra says. “You can come to a meeting early or late, leave too quickly or overstay your welcome. Who do you spend time with? How much time do you give others? These things tell people how important they are to you.”

6. Be adaptable. It takes all kinds to make a world, and your charisma depends partly on how comfortable you make people feel. Alessandra maintains that charisma crosses the boundaries of culture, creed and character. By adapting their approach and style, charismatic types deal equally well with people of all types and backgrounds. “Adaptability is building bridges to others by understanding how to treat them as they want to be treated,” Alessandra says. “It’s simply putting yourself in another person’s shoes – it’s empathy in action.”

7. Have visions of victory. Charisma endows people with more than mere personality. Real charisma enables them to do and be most anything, so those who have it see a bright future. “I believe charismatic people possess an almost childlike faith in their vision and their ability to create change,” says Alessandra. “They have this depth of knowledge, this vision. The strength of their ideas and the passion with which they hold them gives them a different brand of personal magnetism. What do you feel passionate about? What do you really care deeply about?” If you have no answer, keep looking for one. Pour yourself into selling and serving your customers – your dedication and effort may start or renew your passion for your work and everything it encompasses.

Believe in your ability to do great things, and make plans for all you want to accomplish. When prospects, buyers and associates know you’re going places, they may want to tag along.

Alessandra is convinced that we all have charisma potential, but as with any other hidden talent, we must develop it to realize its benefits and our true capabilities. As he says, “It’s just a matter of knowing what the elements of charisma are and how to make them bloom.”

Based on an interview for Selling Power Live! by Lisa Ferrari.

Note: What’s your charisma quotient? Visit alessandra.com and take the charisma quiz online.It will help you expand your personal potential.