Selling Beyond Gender

In his book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, Dr. John Gray clearly delineates the differences in how men and women interact. As the book’s title indicates, men and women may interpret the same words so differently that we don’t even seem to be from the same planet. According to Gray, women often want to share their concern about a problem – not necessarily to solicit a solution, but to validate their feelings. Men are often concerned with solutions to problems, at the expense of understanding their feelings. While these observations may be valid in some cases, they are not universally true and, in sales, we must be careful about making assumptions based on gender alone.

To sell effectively, you have to consider your prospect’s personality and character first and foremost. These examples may offer some insight into how to sell more effectively based on your prospects’ and customers’ gender and thinking style.

The Prospect/Customer says:

“Every time this thing malfunctions the whole department comes to a standstill and overall productivity goes way down. And I’m responsible for maintaining and increasing productivity.”

Gender-Neutral Response:

“It’s interesting you say that because our new System 2700 has proven to be one of the most reliable systems on the market. Here are a few testimonial letters from some of our clients that will attest to its reliability. Does this sound like something that would benefit your department?”

Response For The Customer Concerned with Feelings:

The salesperson’s answer presents a solution to the customer’s problem, but his words may keep him from getting the yes that he wants to hear. A female customer may want to know that you understand the problem and how it affects her, before you leap into presenting a solution. Just as selling benefits instead of features gives your presentation personal impact, many women want to establish that you grasp the problem within the context of their personal circumstances. The salesperson may be better able to close the sale by showing the customer that he understands how equipment failure keeps her from doing her job effectively.

Better responses: “I can appreciate your concerns and I am sorry to hear that you’ve had a bad experience with this equipment. What are some of the potential solutions that you’ve already considered?” or…

“I can imagine how these malfunctions have disrupted your team. What plans do you have to get productivity up to speed to meet your expectations?” or…

“These malfunctions put you in a tight spot. I can understand how you feel. In order to be of service to you, I’d like to know what productivity levels you hope to achieve by when?”

Now that you’ve shown that you grasp the customer’s predicament, you can sell her not only on the fact that your equipment is reliable, but that it will help reduce her anxiety about breakdowns and allow her to do a much better job of increasing productivity.

Response For The Customer Concerned with Solutions:

The gender-neutral response listed before may not speak to the needs a male customer may have when making a buying decision. It’s critical to some men to find a solution that makes them look and feel competent. Every decision maker – man or woman – wants products and services that make them look good to their supervisors or peers, but men may place even more emphasis on this factor than women. Men may look for the salesperson’s understanding of their problem or concern only as it relates to a solution. A better response shows the male customer the benefits of your solution, while allowing him to feel in control of the selling situation and the ultimate buying decision.

Better response: “Our new System 2700 has some impressive features that might help meet your productivity goals. Would you mind spending some time with me to review some of its features and show me which of the features would most benefit your department?”

When you hear a yes to that last question, ask the customer which features would be most important to him and how they would impact productivity. This response doesn’t offer to fix the problem for him, but it does lead him in the right direction. You’re allowing the customer to share his own knowledge and opinions, which allows him to feel in control and empowered to make a competent and effective buying decision.

No one can safely make a blanket statement about how all women or all men like to be sold. Each of your prospects and customers has a unique personality, and each makes buying decisions in a different way. In any selling situation it’s important to communicate in a way that validates or emphasizes what’s important to the individual customer, and gender may help determine what that customer feels is important. Subtle, gender-based changes to your presentation may give you the edge you’re looking for to boost sales.

Just remember: It’s potentially dangerous to your sales to make assumptions based on stereotyped ideas of how people should act – including gender stereotypes. Some men make decisions because of feelings, some women make decisions based on needs for solutions and have no need for you to understand how they feel. By applying the time-honored tradition of professional selling – that a good salesperson appeals to both logic and emotion – you can sell to every prospect you meet.