How Well Do You Handle Disillusionment?

So now you feel a disillusionment that’s leading to a real slump. At some time every salesperson faces the same thing. You can’t go through life with a five-year-old’s notion of reality, yet growing up and accepting the way things are need not lead to cynicism and anger.

Most people don’t have a good way to deal with the feelings that accompany the loss of illusions. But think of it this way. Nothing comes with a guarantee. From minute to minute there is always the chance that the game will shift. Sometimes it shifts in your favor, and sometimes it doesn’t.

In the workplace, I see disillusionment in new employees and I urge their managers to ask a simple question: “Are things as you expected they would be?” There is a good chance, if managers recognize disillusionment and, in fact, expect it, they can help salespeople deal with it.

Disillusionment is also predictable with work teams. Most teams start out with a certain amount of enthusiasm (for solving a problem, getting a task accomplished, working with people in the group). However, reality soon sets in and the team goes into a critical period of disillusionment. “This is more difficult than I thought!” is a common reaction.

If a team knows that disillusionment is normal and can get needed direction and support, the team is more apt to believe in their ability to get through this stage. It’s the same with sales. With a realistic appraisal of the situation and their own expectations of results, a sales team has a good chance of moving into a productive and more satisfying stage.

For salespeople and managers suffering disillusionment or observing it in others, I offer three simple strategies to help survive periods of disillusionment.

Expect disillusionment

Quoting ancient philosophers in the first part of his book The Road Less Traveled, M. Scott Peck explains that life is hard and if you start with that assumption you are less apt to be disappointed by it. Although this is not a cheery, nor even a new, point of view, it is practical. If you come to view hard times as normal, and even necessary, you will be better able to deal with them in constructive ways. Better that than to wallow in self-pity and see yourself as a helpless victim.

In my work with individuals and teams, disillusionment is very predictable, occurring after the “honeymoon” has worn off.

Individuals or groups are faced with the reality that the task ahead of them is likely to be harder than they thought. They may feel inadequate to the task. They may wonder why they took on the assignment. They may fantasize an easy way out. Their initial enthusiasm turns to disillusionment and morale plummets. Knowing that this happens with all individuals and work teams makes it a little easier to bear and manage.

Take a break.

Somehow, taking a break can help you to better deal with reality. This can be a short break or a longer one. For example, when asked what she does to deal with disappointment, Ann Landers once replied that she goes to bed. Not a bad strategy for getting a simple recharge and a fresh start on a new day!

A three-day weekend to have some fun and enjoy life can also help to take a break from the routine. A team could call “time out and move energies to a less complex or stressful task. Even taking time to connect over lunch on a more personal level can provide new energy.

Plan positive steps

The worst thing to do about disillusionment is nothing at all. Instead, you need to redirect the negative energy you have toward a constructive and positive outcome. For example, communicating your frustration and seeking advice from others can often help you find a way through the disillusionment. If talking has not worked well, then try putting your thoughts on paper. Reinforcing the positive things that an individual or work team does well is another effective strategy for building on what works. Planning next steps is yet another way to get you into looking ahead past the current period of frustration.

Essentially we all come to a decision about what we are doing and our commitment to it. “I like it here and am going to stay.” Or, “I don’t like it here and I’m going to leave.” Or, “I don’t like it here and I’m going to stay!” Hopefully, the decision can be if you like your work that you plan to make it work out for you.

In summary, people either forget that disillusionment is a predictable part of life, or have never had a chance to learn that perspective. More often than not, such individuals tend to react to disillusionment by dropping out or losing faith. By remembering that disillusionment is a predictable part of life-whether at work or at home-and being prepared for it with positive actions, you will be more likely to get through it in a timely and positive manner.